Truth Or Dare II
by chuunin alchemist
Summary: Sequel to Truth Or Dare! This time, the jounin are at it! Guest starring Itachi, Kisame, Orochimaru and Kabuto! Be prepared for more chaos! Cameos from the sound five and various Akatsuki members!
1. Chapter 1

To anyone who knows me, here's the sequel! For everyone who doesn't, that's okay, but you'd better read Truth or Dare to get the hang of things. . .

And just so you know, I wrote this as soon as I read my email. To repel writer's block (the accursed!)

Note: I MAY put a serious spoiler in this fic somewhere, so be it! And number two, I declare myself a KakaIru fan so don't be surprised if some comes out in the future!

I give you:

Truth Or Dare II

When: the day before Iruka's party. Where: Akatsuki HQ

"Itachi, we have a new assignment. . ." said Kisame.

Itachi read the mission description, raising an eyebrow.

"This is a party invitation." said the Uchiha.

"The Akatsuki leader says he picked one up after a certain Yuuhi Kurenai left hers at a hotel near Mist country. I recall seeing her with that Asuma jounin a lot, and he got an invitation, so-"

"Don't tell me you WANT to go to that party." said Itachi, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, we should enjoy once in a while, shouldn't we? I asked Deidara to take any missions that we'd be assigned tomorrow if we could go." shrugged Kisame.

"Are you sure Deidara can be trusted?" asked Itachi.

(I don't know whether Deidara's a girl or a guy! I'm running out of pronouns. . .)

Kisame nodded.

"What's this. . . "Invitation to the Godaime's birthday party at Umino Iruka's house at 11:30 am, lunch will be served. Casual attire, gift optional." This is definitely Iruka's doing." said Itachi, remembering the sensei's style of handwriting. He'd had about a year of reading Iruka's reports before he'd been accepted into the Anbu.

"Do you think we should get her a present?" asked Kisame.

Itachi glared.

(reader POV: Itachi sweatdropped.)

"That's your job. I'm going to look for any article of clothing of mint that ISN'T black. Or red. That doesn't have red clouds on it." Itachi considered his options.

"So we're going?" said Kisame, with the enthusiasm of Chouji at the promise of food.

"Yes." replied Itachi. "But only if I find good enough clothes. There's still a good bit of Uchiha pride in me, and I don't want to look bad."

same time. Hidden Village of Sound

Orochimaru checked his calendar.

"Hm. . . It's Tsunade's birthday tomorrow." He said to himself.

"Are we going to Konoha then, Orochimaru-sama?" said Kabuto, popping out of nowhere.

"Of course! We should pay her a visit. . . ." smiled Orochimaru evilly.

"Should we bring escorts or guards?" said Kabuto.

"No, I don't think so. We have no harmful intentions."

"We don't?"

"No. We're just paying our dear Hokage a visit. . . ."

"Orochimaru-sama, sometimes I can't help wondering what on earth your mind is up to." said Kabuto, clearly confused. No escorts? No army? No snakes?

"Help me find a gift for her, Kabuto!" said Orochimaru.

(audience sweatdrops)

the party proper, 1pm

"Where on earth is Kakashi? I told him not to be late for once!" said Iruka, annoyed. First, Kurenai loses her invitation at the Mist country, which could cause a serious security breach, or assassination plot. Then, the hokage and Jiraiya nearly get drunk. Thank goodness Tonton had the presence of ming to keep Tsunade from drinking too much until Kakashi got here with entertainment.

Knowing Kakashi however, he could have brought his entire collection of Icha Icha Paradaisu. Oh well. Karaoke it is, then.

Until. . .

POOF! (I like it when he does that, don't you?)

"YO!" said Kakashi.

"What in heaven's name took you so long!" said Iruka.

"I was busy reading." smiled Kakashi. Iruka was so used to seeing the masked nin that he could tell a smile from everything else.

"Well come on in! Everyone's waiting. I just hope no one's drunk yet."

Secretly, Naruto, Kiba and Lee had stationed themselves outside Iruka's house. They'd staked out the place yesterday, and had had the room bugged (quite literally) by Shino. The bugs had microphones strapped to them, powered by sheer chakra. Kiba had also placed cameras around the windowed areas.

They wouldn't want to miss out on all the fun, of course.

While they were eating lunch in the tree in Iruka's backyard, Lee noticed two suspicious-looking men. They seemed familiar.

Akamaru growled quietly.

"What!" hissed Kiba. "Uchiha Itachi! Kisame!"

"Kisame? Where's his sword?" said Lee.

"They wouldn't be stupid enough to attack a houseful of Konoha's jounin. . ." said Kiba.

"Are my eyes deceiving me or is that Kabuto over there?" said Naruto, careful not to spill his precious instant ramen.

"That's Kabuto all right. . ." said Kiba, after receiving confirmation from Akamaru. "And Orochimaru's with him."

"Should we warn the hokage?" said Lee. "Or Gai-sensei at least!"

"Akamaru doesn't smell medicine on Kabuto, and he ALWAYS carries medicine into a fight. I remember Shizune telling me that once." said Kiba.

"Let's just watch and see!" said Naruto. "I told you guys that bugging the place wasn't overkill!"

And so it begins. . . . .

"Truth or dare?" said Tsunade, amused. "I thought that game was obsolete!"

"Not with this." Said Kakashi, holding up a rather scandalous object of controversy, the infamous Truth Or Dare orb.

_Knock knock_

"Tsunade! Happy birthday!" said Orochimaru.

Everyone stared.

"Huh?" said Shizune.

"Surprised?" said Kabuto. "Kisame told us that there'd be a party for her here."

"KISAME?" said Anko.

"Affirmative. These two were looking lost when they found out that the hokage wasn't in her office." said Itachi.

"UCHIHA!" said Gai, always ready for a dramatic entrance/cutscene/you get the idea. "What are you doing here?"

Itachi waved the invitation in the air.

"We picked this up in Mist country."

"Kurenai. . . ." said Iruka, with a hint of annoyance in his voice.

"No worries, we only came for the party." smiled Kisame, giving Tsunade her gift.

"Itachi, one question." said Kakashi.

Dramatic pause.

"Why the sunglasses?"

Most of the room's occupants burst into laughter.

"You don't expect me to wander into Konoha with the Anbu on my tail, do you?" said Itachi, annoyed.

"Now, now, this is a party." said Kakashi. "First and foremost, we're at a truce for today. So let's begin the game, shall we?"

(If you read Truth Or Dare, you'll know the format. If you don't, it's bottle-spinning.)

"Who spins first?"

"ME!" said Anko. "Everyone sit down."

While everyone sat down, Itachi helped himself to some dango (something like dumplings on a stick), which, incidentally, are his favourite food.

Even Uchiha Itachi can be human sometimes.

Anko spun the bottle.

outside

"HEY!" said Naruto. "Isn't that Sakura's-"

"I know!" said Kiba. "So now we know what happened to it!"

The three sent each other mischievous glares.

"This is gonna be fun!" said the three simultaneously.

inside

"OROCHIMARU!" shouted Anko.

"Truth."

Kabuto was pleasantly surprised. He thought Orochimaru would choose dare.

Anko read the paper.

"What kind of cheap dare is this! What's your favourite color?"

"Oh boy." said Orochimaru to himself. "Anything but that."

No one noticed the Kikaichu beetle under the table next to Orochimaru.

outside

"Is the tape recorder on?" asked Lee.

"Yeah, it's only supposed to pick up what the Kikaichu mikes hear." replied Naruto.

"Good."

inside

"What's taking so long, HM, Orochimaru?" said Jiraiya.

"Just say it already!" said Kisame, excited.

". . . . . . . . . . ."

". . . . . . . . . . ."

(drumroll, please! Thank you)

". . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .pink."

"WHAT!"

"I said pink! No reason to be all shocked!"

Kabuto was on the verge of tears. Anko and Kisame were laughing like crazy. Kakashi snickered. Outside, the boys were hooting with laughter.

Jiraiya was grinning like a lunatic.

"So THAT'S why you never told us when we were kids!" he chuckled. "I always assumed it was purple! Hahaha! Looks can be deceiving!"

"This is great!" laughed Tsunade. "What a nice birthday present, a good laugh!"

Orochimaru pouted, snatched the orb from where Anko had dropped it and spun the bottle.

(spin sound effects)

"Hatake."

"Dare, pink one"

More laughter.

The paper dispensed something that MANY fangirls would enjoy.

"Who's got a camera?" asked Orochimaru.

"HERE!" said Gai, in one of his wacky poses. "The camera of youth! Youth it shall capture! Youth it shall preserve! Youth-"

"Enough already." said Orochimaru, fiddling with the controls.

"Kakashi, take off your mask."

outside

"WHAT!" siad all three shinobi.

"Kiba! Where'd you put the camera!" said a frantic Naruto.

"It's positioned at that windowsill! We can control it from this!" said Kiba, brandishing a laptop. "Shikamaru's."

"How long has it been on?" said Lee.

"Since Itachi got here." grinned Kiba.

inside

"Show your face, Kakashi!" said an anxious Kurenai.

Asuma whimpered in the corner, ignored by his loved one.

Iruka's curiosity was aroused. He really wanted to see Kakashi's face.

"I'll bet you a thousand yen that he's got facial hair!" said Kisame to Anko, his newfound friend.

"You're on! Shizune! Wanna bet?" said Anko.

"No thanks, Anko-chan!" said Shizune, sitting beside Kabuto.

Kabuto had fished a digital camera (one of Oto's trademarks: the best digital cameras in the industry) out of his bag and proceeded to aim it at Kakashi.

Kakashi reluctantly pulled off his mask. . . .

Iruka gasped. Kakashi was GORGEOUS.

Anko gaped. Shizune stared. Tsunade nearly dropped Tonton. Kurenai gasped slightly more dramatically than Iruka, and has an obvious look of pleasure on her face.

The camera wielders proceeded to take pictures.

"Happy?" said Kakashi. He smiled at Iruka.

Iruka's mind: Oh god. Oh god. OH MY GOD. He. . . He's. . . . Wait a minute, why does he turn me on! Who cares, dang he looks good. . . . . Erk! Why am I getting THAT feeling down there!

"No facial hair, thank goodness!" said Anko. "Pay up, sharky!"

Kisame grumbled, and reluctantly gave Anko the money.

outside

"Take pictures! Take pictures!" said Lee. Kakashi, he had to say, was a quite youthful subject.

"Wow, he looks good!" said Kiba. "No wonder he keeps himself masked, it's to keep all the fangirls away! Wonder if Sasuke should do that. . ."

"This is just the beginning. . . ." snickered Naruto.

And that's the first chapter! Hoped you liked reading it as much as I liked writing it! Click the review button if you have any ideas! Or write your own fic!

See ya next chapter!


	2. Chapter 2

And here I am again, bored out of my wits! Whoever said summer vacation was fun hasn't met me!

I give you the product of hours of frustrated boredom and typing!

Truth Or Dare II chapter 2

now where were we? Oh yes+

Kakashi had taken off his mask.

Oustide, Kiba had managed to get several pics of the thing, and had connected to the net wirelessly. He was now sending the pictures to numerous Kakashi fangirls.

Meanwhile. . . . .

"Gak! Who knew that Kakashi looked so. . . ." said Shizune.

Kabuto hmphed. (No, this is not a typo.)

Kakashi spun the bottle while all the girls were staring at him. (With the exception of Anko, who was gloating in triumph at her successful betting.)

(More lousy bottle spin effects)

"Kabuto-kun!" said Kakashi cheerfully. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare. A nin of Otogakure (hope I got it right) wouldn't back away from any challenge."

"Unlike your pink friend over there?" said Kakashi, gesturing to Orochimaru.

More crazy laughter, as the orb dispensed the dare.

outside

"What on earth are you guys doing snickering in that tree?" said Neji, on his afternoon stroll.

"What are you doing here then, Neji?" asked Lee.

"I was wondering why on earth you'd miss training, even with Gai-sensei on leave today. It isn't like you. Tenten would have come with me if she hadn't been trying to get her hands on those scandal shots from the other day, remember?"

(If ya read Truth Or Dare, you'd know. . . .)

"Anyway, you haven't answered my question."

"Look at this!" said Kiba. He had produced out of nowhere a mini printer (The kind you connect a camera to that prints pics instantly), which he had used to print a pic of the maskless Kakashi-sensei.

". . . . . .Kakashi-sensei!" said Neji, flabbergasted.

(Neji: Why the term flabbergasted? It doesn't suit me!)

(Me: Would you prefer shocked to the point of pant wetting?)

(Neji:. . . . . . . . . . .)

(Me: I didn't think so. Back to the fic!)

Naruto however, was intently staring at the laptop, watching thevideo feedback from the cameras. Kabuto had been ordered into a closet, which thankfully had an infrared night vision camera AND a Kikaichu beetle mike as well.

inside the closet

"What on earth is that pervy sensei up to?" thought Kabuto.

Outside the closet, Kakashi had spun the bottle once more, and it had landed on Anko.

"Now, you have to go into the closet as well, Anko-chan." grinned the sensei.

Iruka's mind: He looks cute when he smiles. . . No no no no no! I'll be a bad example to my students! Ack. . . . Why did Kakahi have to look so good. . . .

"What am I supposed to do, Kakashi-sensei. . . . ." said Anko, with suspicion.

"Kiss him."

"WHAT? No (insert popular swearword here) WAY!"

"Would you prefer it out here in broad daylight?" said Kakashi.

outside

"What's going on up there?" said Neji, who was at the bottom of the tree. If he climbed up there, the branch Kiba Naruto and Lee were sitting on would probably break.

This didn't stop him from hearing the Kikaichu mike feedback however.

"Kiss him." said the laptop speakers.

"Is that Kakashi-sensei?" wondered Neji.

The young prodigy activated his Byakugan and saw all.

inside

"NO (even more swearwords) WAY AM I KISSING KABUTO!" said Anko, much to Orochimaru's amusement.

"What's so funny, pink boy?" said Anko.

"It should be quite an easy task for you, Anko-chan, unless you're not professional enough to do it."

"Why? I don't suppose YOU'VE kissed Kabuto before, have you?" replied the young kunoichi, pointing.

At this point, even Uchiha Itachi had to laugh. Orochimaru's face had turned into his favorite color.

"Of course not!" said Orochimaru. "And I'm not planning to do it in the future, rest assured!" He was panicking now.

Anko shrugged, then reluctantly walked to the closet door.

"She's actually gonna do it?" said Tsunade.

"Pity I don't have Byakugan. . ." said Itachi to himself. "If I did, I wouldn't be missing this. . ."

However, there was only one person within a 50-foot radius with the Byakugen. And conveniently enough, he was outside Iruka's house.

outside

"Even with the infrared camera, it's hard to see. . ." said Naruto.

"Oi, Neji, see anything?" said Lee.

"Yes. I see a very jumpy Kabuto." snickered the Hyuuga.

inside

"What on earth are YOU doing here?" said Kabuto.

"Don't tell me you didn't hear my shouting!" said Anko.

"Unfortunately, no. It seems that Iruka keeps his walls soundproofed. The only way I could have heard what you guys were saying was if I bugged the room." said Kabuto, not noticing the bug near the ceiling. He also didn't notice the tiny camera on the coat hanger on the wall.

"Well. . . ." shrugged Anko. "I have to kiss you."

outside

The three tree-bound shinobi nearly dropped the laptop when it screamed "NANI?"

The fourth conspirator nearly dropped to the ground in laughter himself, but instead focused on the two people in the closet.

inside

"Why can't we hear anything?" asked Kurenai.

"All my walls are soundproofed. It's something I learned when I was taking care of Naruto." Said Iruka.

(cue)

"Ah, the love of youth!" said Gai, twirling around. "So beautiful, and yet so controversial! So youthful!"

Of course, the two in the closet didn't hear Tonton's attempts to murder Gai after he'd stepped on the pig's tail.

"I guess there's no way out of this. . . ." said Kabuto.

Anko nodded, the clenched her fists.

"What's that for?"

"In case you try anything frisky."

"To you?" said Kabuto, eyeing Anko's body. "Hm. . . That might not be a bad idea."

outside

The genin burst out in laughter after seeing Anko slap Kabuto.

"That reaction was hilarious! So Kabuto IS a guy after all!" said Kiba.

"You sure? For all we know, he MIGHT be sleeping with Orochimaru." said Lee.

Until the laptop whispered "Is this your first?"

inside once more

After recovering from Anko's power slap, Kabuto asked: " Is this your first?"

Anko, blushed slightly, and nodded.

"Mine too." said Kabuto.

(Kiba: There goes THAT theory.)

(Lee: Maybe it's his first with the opposite gender.)

(Me: Stop trying to make this into a yaoi, for pete's sake! Back to the fic!)

"Let's just get this over with." said Anko.

"That's MY line." said Kabuto, pinning Anko to the wall. He leaned in. . .

Anko felt Kabuto's lips press against hers, as he kissed her. She impulsively wrapped her arms around Kabuto's neck, but quickly withdrew them seconds later.

Seconds, however, was long enough for Kiba, Naruto and Lee to take some prime pictures.

Outside of the closet. . . .

"What on earth are those two doing?" wondered Kisame.

"What on earth are YOU doing?" said Itachi. Kisame appeared to be playing with Iruka's cat.

"What?"

"I thought cats ATE fish. Oh yes, cats play with their food before eating." said Itachi, munching on his second stick of dango.

"You're enjoying yourself, aren't you?" said Kisame. The cat was now purring against Kisame's leg.

"They don't serve this at the Akatsuki base." said Itachi, whose expression could remind a person of Naruto when he was eating ramen.

"Anyway, somebody had better check up on those two. Somebody whose favorite color ain't pink." said Kisame.

"STOP RUBBING IT IN ALREADY!" said Orochimaru, like an impatient schoolboy.

"I'll do it." said the Godaime. She was about to open the door when the two came out.

"Kabuto's a lousy kisser." declared Anko.

"You looked like you were enjoying it." said Kabuto, who picked up the truth or dare orb.

Shizune noticed that the two were slightly panting for breath, and were hot and sweaty.

Kabuto spun the bottle.

(another round of spin effects)

"Uchiha. Truth or dare?"

"Dare."

outside

Sasuke was out for some fresh air when he noticed his teammate in a tree. Which happened to be in his sensei's yard.

He also noticed Kiba and Lee staring at a laptop anxiously.

"Oi, dobe, why are you up that tree?"

As soon as Naruto heard "dobe", he fell out of the tree. He was also the one holding the laptop.

"Naruto BAKA! Is the laptop okay?" said Kiba.

Sasuke seized the laptop and sat on the ground.

"ANIKI!" said Sasuke. "In Iruka-sensei's house!"

"We were surprised as well!" said Lee. "You're watching what's happening in Iruka-sensei's house right now!"

"KAKASHI-SENSEI'S MASK IS OFF!" said Sasuke, astounded.

Neji deactivated the Byakugan and sat next to Sasuke.

"See that? It seems Kakashi-sensei found Sakura's orb." said Neji, pointing to the orb in Kabuto's hands.

"Shush! It's Itachi's turn!" said Naruto.

inside

Kabuto was having fits of laughter when he read the dare.

Anko read it for him.

"You have to let us fix your hair." she giggled.

"What's so funny about that?" wondered Itachi.

"We use barrettes, scrunchies, pins, and. . . .ribbons!" said Anko, bursting into laughter.

"WHAT!" said Itachi, hugging his ponytail as if to protect it.

"Here!" said Shizune, handing Anko a pink girl's hair kit. "My niece lives nearby and she let me borrow this!"

"I'll never live this down. . . ." said Itachi, attempting to escape Kurenai's hairbrush.

"Hold still!" said Tsunade, dragging Itachi to a chair.

By now, most of the male jounin were laughing.

(Iruka's mind: ooh he looks so nice when he laughs. . . Ack! What am I THINKING? Am I. . . No, it can't be!)

Kakashi then noticed the looks Iruka was giving him.

He pondered about the confused chuunin while Itachi's tortue continued. . . .

How'd you like THAT? Hm? Hm?

What should I make Jiraiya do? Some suggestions would be nice. . . . Anyway, thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

No stopping it now! Heat is upon us! Argh! Why doesn't it snow in the tropics! We sure need it!

And for those wondering what Itachi is supposed to look like with ribbons, I suggest you go to those photo sharing sites and look at ANY pic with Itachi in it that has the color PINK.

Truth Or Dare II chapter 3

Uchiha Itachi was in tears. No, it had nothing to do with his family. Nothing to do with the Akatsuki, except for the off chance that somebody had taken a photo (which was what several mischievous shinobi outside were doing) and would show it to a member. If this happened, Itachi's career was finished.

No, it HAD to be ribbons. And bows. And barrettes. And hairpins. And—And—

All in his silky Uchiha hair.

"Hold still, Ita-chan!" said Tsunade teasingly.

"DO NOT CALL ME ITA-CHAN!" yelled the missing nin, tied to a chair.

"Oh, but it suits you so well now!" smiled Tsunade. "Doesn't he look just kawaii, Kisame-kun?"

"I'll say!" said Kisame, rolling around on the floor in laughter, not unlike a certain Inuzuka who was doing the exact same thing outside.

"Really! Pink should be YOUR favorite color, Uchiha-kun, it brings out the color of your eyes." said Orochimaru.

"Now if only I had brought a camera with me!" thought Kakashi to himself. "Sasuke-kun would have liked to see this!"

Iruka's mind once again: Is he thinking about me? ARGH! Where are these thoughts coming from! Stupid author!

(Me: Bad, Iruka-chan! You REALLY want me to put you and Kakashi in the closet, dontcha?)

(Iruka: Ack! NO!)

Now speaking of cameras. . . .

outside

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm NEVER letting Aniki forget this, as long as I live!" laughed Sasuke. It was the kind of laugh that'd make a Sasuke fangirl scream with delight.

"I never realized that Kiba-kun and Kisame-san were so similar. . ." said Lee. "Both have animal characteristics. . ."

"Oooh, we'd better send these pics to the Akatsuki!" said Naruto, accessing the internet wirelessly. "But how?"

"Check Shikamaru's email addresses. I heard him say he met Deidara in a chatroom" said Neji deviously.

Naruto clicked the instant messenger icon, and accessed Shikamaru's ID. Deidara was online. (And please don't ask how I thought of the ID names. And if Deidara IS a guy, don't murder me pls. I'm only human.)

dara-chan(akatsuki): Shikamaru?

shadownin(konoha): This is a pal of Shikamaru's. You know where Itachi and Kisame went?

dara-chan(akatsuki): Yeah, supposedly to the hokage's birthday party or something. No one had any missins today, so it's boring around here.

shadownin(konoha): Well, I'm sending you pics of what's going on.

Naruto sent Deidara the pics of Itachi's doom, several scandalous Kisame/Anko pics and a recording of Orochimaru's slipups (The "pink" and "Kabuto kiss" incidents).

(I hope there won't be any new pairings just because I wrote that. . . . I leave that for someone else to write!)

dara-chan(akatsuki): . . . . . . .LOL! Sankyuu! Sasori and the others will love this!

inside

Oblivious to his impending humiliation, Itachi spun the bottle.

". . . Shizune, am I right?"

The nervous nin nodded.

"Truth or dare."

"Truth."

The scandalous orb quickly devised a question.

Itachi looked bored.

"Are you afraid of mice?" he asked.

All of a sudden, Shizune took on a powerful aura.

"M-mice! WHERE!" she squeaked. Tonton retreated under the table due to the scary aura.

Speak of the devil, a mouse-shaped toy belonging to Iruka's cat was lying around innocently.

"M-MOUSE! EVIL BEING! FOUL RODENT!" shrieked Shizune, jumping onto the highest nearby object, which happened to be Kabuto.

"Ack! Calm down, Shizune!" said Kabuto. He was also affected by the aura.

"Are you afraid of mice or not?" said Itachi. He seemed oblivious to the strange events.

"YES!" whimpered Shizune, burying her face into Kabuto's neck.

It just so happened that Kabuto's neck was one of his sensitive points.

Kabuto let out a moan of distinct pleasure, much to Anko's annoyance. She quickly kicked the mouse toy under the table beside Tonton and tapped Shizune's shoulder.

"Get down from there you coward." she said.

"Ah, ah, do I sense jealousy?" said Orochimaru, in that annoying way of talking unique to villains.

"Shut up."

Shizune eventually got down from Kabuto and was handed the orb.

(corny spinning sound effects)

"Jiraiya! Truth or dare?"

"Dare!"

Shizune read the paper.

"Heheh. . . . Spin the bottle."

Jiraiya spun the bottle.

And of all the ironies, he got Iruka.

"Iruka-sensei, I suppose you are familiar with a particular jutsu of Naruto's. . . .?" smiled Shizune evilly.

outside

"What jutsu of Naruto's?" said Lee.

"Rasengan?" guessed Neji.

Kiba's guess was the most accurate.

"ORIOKE NO JUTSU!" he cried.

inside

"NANI!" said Iruka. "I have to do THAT! What does Jiraiya do then!"

"No, Jiraiya's the one supposed to do the Orioke no Jutsu." snickered Shizune. "He has to do a sexy dance in front of you."

"Oho!" said Jiraiya. "This is going to be interesting!"

Kakashi's eyebrow lifted in mild amusement. The look on Iruka's face was priceless.

Jiraiya used the Orioke no Jutsu, causing Asuma to have a nosebleed. Kisame stared. Kabuto nearly barfed (he knew it was Jiraiya). Orochimaru scoffed at the lameness of the tecnique while Itachi. . . Covered his eyes. This was one jutsu he DIDN'T want to learn.

Itachi noticed Kisame staring.

"So the Kyuubi made that technique? Interesting. I can see why the leader wants him captured, as that technique's got Kisame mesmerized." Thought Itachi.

"Iruka. . . ." said Jiraiya, in a feminine voice. He/she sat on Iruka's lap.

Iruka didn't know whether to be disgusted or to get a nosebleed.

"Just. . . . .Get this over with!" said the chuunin.

"Aren't you having fun, Iruka?" said Jiraiya, adjusting his position, making Iruka blush furiously.

Iruka sent a desperate look at Kakashi, who seemed to be enjoying the scene.

As Jiraiya proceeded to dance, Kakashi couldn't help being reminded of a particular scene in Icha Icha Paradaisu. . .

outside

"This is weird. . ." said Kiba.

"This is just wrong. . . . Poor Iruka-sensei. . ." said Sasuke, in his trademark thinking position.

"I'm beginning to feel sick. . . ." said Lee, his complexion turning to the shade of his tights.

"Hey, look at Kakashi-sensei, he's not looking at Jiraiya. . . ." said Neji, alert as always.

"Yeah, he's looking at. . . . IRUKA-SENSEI!" said Naruto.

inside, 15 minutes later

Everyone had recovered sufficiently after that. Except poor, poor Iruka-sensei.

"So, I spin the bottle?" said Jiraiya, master of the obvious.

The bottle landed on. . . . .

. . . . . . Kisame.

This one took me a while. Darn writer's block! Mendokuse. . .

Hoped you liked this one. And should I put Deidara in the party? Is Deidara a girl or guy? If you're gonna review, give me your opinion! Thanks!


	4. Chapter 4

Ah. . . . After billions of years, boredom still reigns on this earth. . . . Probably why fanfiction was invented, eheh

Now where were we? Kisame's dare? And I'm writing this while watching FMA in Japanese so don't be surprised to find a typo or two. There's a bit of DeidaraxSasori fluff here, so don't flame me. (The previous statement reminds me of Roy Mustang, haha)

Truth Or Dare chapter 4

Akatsuki HQ

Deidara was busy organizing the Akatsuki mission records when he got an IM from a chatmate.

"What's this? Shika-kun?"

He (yes, HE! I decided he'd be a guy. . . but to be on the safe side, he'll be feminine like Haku!) checked the window. It wasn't Shikamaru, but it was an acquaintance of his. . .

_dara-chan(akatsuki): Shikamaru?_

_shadownin(konoha): This is a pal of Shikamaru's. You know where Itachi and Kisame went?_

_dara-chan(akatsuki): Yeah, supposedly to the hokage's birthday party or something. No one had any missins today, so it's boring around here._

_shadownin(konoha): Well, I'm sending you pics of what's going on._

Deidara proceeded to check his email.

"Oh gosh. . . . This is gonna make great blackmail material!" squealed Deidara.

_dara-chan(akatsuki): . . . . . . .LOL! Sankyuu! Sasori and the others will love this!_

Sasori wondered why on earth his partner was sniggering wildly in his room. He opened the door. . .

"Oi, Deidara, you'd better have a good reason for all that noise." said Sasori.

"As if this wasn't reason enough?" snickered Deidara.

Sasori took a good look at the screen. His eyes widened to the size of Lee's eyes.

"Uchiha Itachi? In. . . Ribbons!" said the astounded Sasori. "This is great, Deidara! Who knew you were so good at doctoring photos?"

"Ah, but that's the beauty of it, Sasori-kun. . . I'm starting to understand your views about art." smiled Deidara.

"NOW you get it. . ." said Sasori. "This is why cameras exist. To combine both our opinions on art."

"They also exist for blackmail purposes." laughed Deidara, enlarging the picture of Kisame and Anko.

Sasori's eyebrows raised. "I had no idea he was interested in younger women."

"That's not the only one." Giggled Deidara, playing the recording of Orochimaru.

5 minutes later. . .

"The snake guy liked PINK! And he's interested in that hermit crab subordinate of his?" laughed Sasori. Sasori was not a man that laughed often.

(Note: for those who don't know, Kabuto means hermit crab. It can also be translated as a kind of beetle, or as a kind of military helmet used by samurai. But this is not a Japanese language class, so let's go back to the fic.)

"Sasori-kun, can I send it to the other members?" said Deidara cutely. (I find Deidara cute!)

"Don't you 'Sasori-kun' me. And what you do with your email is your business." said Sasori. "Just make sure I get a copy of those document, okay, Deidara-kun?"

"Hai!" said Deidara, chibified.

Sasori looked at the missing nin with a big smile on his face. Sometimes, he thought that joining the Akatsuki was the best decision of his life.

"Ne, Sasori-kun, can we go to the party? Speaking of cameras, I bought a digital one that I want to try out. . ." said Deidara.

"Fine, fine, there's nothing to do here anyway." said Sasori.

"Yatta!" said Deidara. "Party crashing!"

Iruka's house

It had been about five minutes since Kisame's dare was assigned.

"What kind of stupid dare is this!" said Kisame, doing a handstand. With one hand. Gamakichi (remember Jiraiya's small red frog?) and Gamatatsu (the small yellow frog) were sitting on the soles of Kisame's feet.

"Keep quiet you, I like the view from up here." said Gamakichi.

"Onaka suita. . ." said Gamatatsu. "I'm hungry."

"You keep quiet as well, Gamatatsu." Said Gamakichi.

"And what exactly am I supposed to do next. . . .?" said Kisame.

outside

"This is hilarious!" said Naruto, rolling around the ground in laughter. Indeed, the genin were all quite amused. The adult nin were almost twice as funny as they themselves were.

Neji was continuing Naruto's job of emailing the scandalous data to Deidara, and various others. Tayuya was online as well. It seemed that even as powerful as they were, they hadn't managed to kill ANY of the sound five, with a possible exception of Kimimaro, who was bedridden. Tayuya had kept contact with Shikamaru after the incident, and often played Shougi (Japanese chess) online.

flutemaster(Oto): Hey. . . How'd you get my id?

cagedbird(Konoha): Hi tayuya. It's Neji, I'm using Shikamaru's computer.

flutemaster(Oto): Hyuuga? Ok, what's with this file you sent me?

cagedbird(Oto): Open the recording.

Oto, Kimimaro's room

"Tayuya. . . What are you doing?" asked Kimimaro.

"Chatting with the Konoha genin. Don't worry, I won't give anything away." She replied. Tayuya clicked the recording.

"Taku, get well already, Kimimaro!" said Kidoumaru, entering the room. "Huh? What's that?"

The recording played. . .

. . . and all three laughed.

"O-orochimaru-sama. . ." said Kimimaro, laughing so hard, several horns began sticking out of his back.

"Control yourself, you porcupine!" giggled Tayuya. "We don't want holes in your bedsheets like when Jiroubu ate those oranges!"

"He had about four in his mouth at the time!"

"Let him laugh!" chuckled Kidoumaru. "I hear that happy patients heal faster. In any case, who'd have thought the Otokage himself was in love with Kabuto of all people?"

"Anyway, now that we know he's gay, we'd better be careful around him. . . Seeing the age difference of those two, I wouldn't want to be a guy right now. . ." smiled Tayuya.

The two teenage boys expressions changed from that of humor to shock.

"Who sent that to you anyway?" said Kidoumaru.

"That Hyuuga guy you fought. He bumped into some pals of his who happened to be spying on their sensei's party, and lo and behold, two Akatsuki members PLUS our dear Orochimaru-sama and Kabuto-nii-san were there."

"Now how did he get that recording?" wondered Kimimaro.

"Don't ask me. All I know is that they're playing truth or dare." said Tayuya, who continued chatting with Neji.

"Do they happen to have a webcam?" asked Kimimaro.

"I'll check. . . ."

flutemaster(Oto): Ne, Hyuuga, do you happen to have a webcam attachment somewhere?

cagedbird(Konoha): Not sure. Let me check. . .

"Oi, Kiba! Any chance of a webcam connection on one of the cameras?" said Neji.

"I think so, let me check the cameras." said Kiba, who was beside Naruto and (now) Sasuke, both laughing themselves crazy.

inside

"Blech!" said Kisame. "You want me to drink this horrible stuff standing upside down with two frogs singing the Macarena on my feet!"

"Yes," said Jiraiya. "Although the Macarena part was rather unexpected. . ."

"And it's just tea." said Tsunade. "This stuff's delicious."

"Kisame only drinks soda and seawater." said Itachi, smiling. (Cue fangirls! Get earplugs!) "Sometimes, both at the same time."

"Ew." said Anko. "No wonder your skin's blue."

"Better blue than green." said Kisame, who continued drinking the tea.

"GREEN IS YOUTHFUL!" shouted Gai. "Let us all sing in celebration of our youth!'

And so, Gai-sensei joined Gamakichi and Gamatatsu in singing the Macarena.

". . . . You're right." said Anko. "But you can't help laughing at it, can't you?"

outside

"GAI-SENSEI! How youthful!" said Lee.

"Not you too!" said Sasuke. He detested the Macarena.

Around that time, Gaara was walking about in that area.

"Naruto?" he said. He jumped the fence, and saw the nin.

"Gaara! Take a look at this!" said Naruto. He was highly amused.

Gaara looked at the laptop, subconsciously grabbing a copy of the 'Kakashi Unmasked' picture, which Lee had been printing.

"T-this is. . ."

"Great, isn't it?" said Lee.

Gaara sat down between Lee and Neji, just as Kiba came back with a rather suspiciopus-lookin wire. . .

Oto

Kidoumaru and Jiroubu were playing poker with Sakon and Ukon (let's say they found a way to separate the two) when the webcam was fully operational.

"Hey! You guys!" said Tayuya. "The webcam's working!"

The boys quickly rushed to the table.

"H-hey! I'm missing all the action!" said Kimimaro.

"Jiroubu!" said Tayuya, without taking her eyes off the screen.

Jiroubu walked over to Kimimaro's bed and lifted it with ease. He dropped it in front of the computer table.

With Kimimaro still on the bed.

"Be careful!" said Kimimaro.

back to Iruka's house

"Finally!" said Kisame, who was about to spin the bottle when. . .

outside

"Oi. Hyuuga. Recognise those two?" said Gaara. (Note: these events took place BEFORE the kidnapping incidents and stuff)

"No. But they're definitely Akatsuki." said Neji. "That one that looks like a girl is probably Deidara."

"Nani?" said Sasuke. "More Akatsuki?"

"Now that they're closer, I recognize that other one." said Gaara. "That's Sasori, from Suna. He made Kankurou's puppets."

Deidara noticed the genin in the bushes.

"Hi! Are you the guys who sent me the blackmail material?" he said cheerfully.

They froze.

"Y-you're a guy?" said Neji.

"Reminds me of Haku." said Naruto.

"Yeah, we sent it." said Sasuke coolly.

"Domo arigatou!" said Deidara. Sasori rolled his eyes.

"Are we crashing this party or not?" said Sasori.

"Hai, hai." said Deidara, waving at the boys.

inside

_knock knock_

Itachi, who was nearst to the door, answered.

"Uchiha-dono!" said Deidara cheerfully.

"D-deidara. . ."

"KISAME!"


	5. Chapter 5

Ah! Sorry for the wait, my internet connection went on strike. No kidding. The dang modem just quit connecting for almost two weeks and the technician said there was nothing wrong with it. Phooey.

And if you don't know who half the characters are (like some people that reviewed, no names shall be given) then feel free to research! I did mine!

Truth Or Dare II chapter 5

"KISAME!" yelled the shocked Uchiha.

"Huh? Deidara!"

"Konichiwa, Kisame-kuun!" smiled Deidara, sitting down on the tatami mats in Iruka's living room. "Ah! Kabuto-kun! Orochimaru-chan! Long time no see!"

"Orochimaru-**CHAN**!" said Jiraiya.

"Yup! Did you know, Orochimaru-chan gives the best manicures in Akatsuki next to Itachi-dono---oomph!" said Deidara, mouth covered by both Itachi and Orochimaru in unison.

"Ahahahaha!" said Orochimaru, sweatdropping. "Don't listen to him, he's been drinking again! Right, Sasori-dono!"

". . . . No comment." said Sasori, helping himself to some orange juice.

"That's a HIM?" said Shizune. "He's pretty!"

Kakashi examined Itachi's nails.

"Oho! Those weren't there in our Anbu days, were they, Uchiha-kun?" said Kakashi amusedly. "Although the purple can be explained by Orochimaru-pink-chan's lack of taste. . ."

"I like the ribbons, Uchiha-dono." smirked Sasori.

Itachi hmph-ed and sat down in his former position, just as Iruka came out of the kitchen.

"Gyah!" screamed Iruka. "More Akatsuki! There must be a serious breach of security in Konoha. . ."

"I'll work on it." said the half drunk Tsunade.

"AH! This is not a security breach but an opportunity for friendship!" said Gai. 'Having friends is YOUTHFUL!"

Ping! (Cue Gai-sensei pose)

"Uh, shall we continue?" said Kisame meekly, pointing to the orb.

Kisame spun the bottle. . . .

outside 

"O-ro-chi-ma-ru-CHAN!" laughed Kiba, who was (yet again) rolling on the floor.

"Gai-sensei! So youthful!" sang Lee.

"I'm liking this more and more. . . ." sniggered Neji.

"This is highly amusing, Hyuuga." grinned Gaara, patting his pal (no, really!) on the back.

5 seconds later. . .

"Naruto?" wondered Gaara out loud.

"Hey, where IS he?" said Lee.

"Sasuke's gone, too!" said Kiba.

3 seconds later. . .

"YAOI!" cried Lee.

"Those two?" said Neji, his eyebrows raised.

"Deidara chose truth." said Gaara, looking at the laptop.

"Later!" said Kiba, looking for Naruto.

However. . . .

"Ah! That feels much better." said Naruto, in front of a tree. "Didn't realize I had to go to the bathroom so soon."

"Naruto! Oi, dobe, where are you?" shouted Sasuke.

"Shut up, Sasuke-teme!" said Naruto, turning around.

Sasuke blushed a brilliant red.

"Huh? What's up, Sasuke-teme?"

"y-you. . . ." stuttered Sasuke.

"Aha! There they are-WHOA!" said Kiba.

Gaara's eyes widened. "They'd gotten THAT far!"

Neji took a glance then about-faced, pushing Gaara and Kiba back. "Let's leave the two alone."

Lee however. . .

"OH MY GOSH! BY THE SPRINGTIME OF YOUTH, I COMMEND YOU!" said Lee, the air around him shimmering fantastically. He posed. "The blossom of love! What a sweet moment! HOW YOUTHFUL!—oof!"

For Neji had conveniently poked (or gentle fist or whatever you want to call it) him in the stomach, and proceeded to drag him back to where the laptop was.

"Huh?" said Naruto. A breeze passed by. Only then did Naruto realize that. . . .

And by now, Sasuke was looking down to the ground, face redder than Gaara's hair.

. . . " I FORGOT TO ZIP UP MY PANTS!"

back inside 

"Truth!" said Deidara cutely.

Iruka noticed Kakashi looking at Deidara, and felt a slight pang of jealousy.

Iruka's mind: Am. . . am I jealous! Why! Why am I developing these feelings. . . Or maybe I had these feelings all along but never realized it. . . . NO!

Kakashi looked at Iruka who was looking at him. He smiled. Iruka turned slightly pink and looked at the cookies on the table.

"Give me three of Uchiha Itachi's most well kept secrets!" said Kisame triumphantly.

"THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT!" said Itachi, looking at the paper.

"Oh yes it is, Itachi-dono." grinned Sasori, looking over Kisame's shoulder.

"Well for starters—" started Deidara, only to find himself loking into the eyes of Mangekyo Sharingan. (hope I got that right)

"Don't you dare." growled Itachi.

"Too late for that, Ita-chan, he picked dare." smirked Tsunade.

"WILL YOU STOP THAT!" said Itachi. "I haven't been picked on this badly since kindergarten!"

"I DO recall an incident involving you scaring the wits out of several rather charred looking kids. . ." said Kakashi.

"Yes." said Iruka. "He'd used the sharingan to copy Sandaime's Katon Kyokaku no jutsu (the flamethrower jutsu) and nearly burnt the school building."

Several veins pulsed on Itachi's brow. He glared at Deidara.

"One down. . . ." he muttered, loud enough for Kisame to hear.

"On the contrary, Itachi-dono." pointed out Sasori. "Deidara's the one supposed to be storytelling, not anyone else. Any other little tidbits divulged by anyone else aren't included."

"Nice one, Sasori-kun!" smiled Deidara.

"Where did you get those investigatory skills?" asked Kisame.

"Oh, Zetsu's been giving me lessons." shrugged Sasori.

"Okay! Did you guys know that Itachi subscribes to –" Deidara pulls out a PDA and accesses the internet…

The small screen showed a website decorated with various fishing lures.

"- Fisherman's Bulletin? (Made this up. If it exists, so help me.) He goes to this site whenever Kisame's not around so that he doesn't get offended."

Kisame looked at Itachi, eyes wide.

"How could you! To think I. . . I TRUSTED YOU!" bawled the blue skinned ninja.

Anko rubbed Kisame's back, while Sasori laughed at the reaction of Itachi's partner.

Kakashi chuckled. Here again was the situation of the eldest Uchiha amusing him.

By now, Iruka had (unbelievably) thrown caution to the winds and was looking at Kakashi with a big smile on his face.

"Just one question, Itachi-san." said Kabuto, his hand raised.

Itachi looked at Kabuto.

"Is it because you like Dango?" said Kabuto. "I hear that there's an extremely hard to make Dango recipe that involves a certain fish that can only be caught with certain kinds of bait."

Itachi looked at Kabuto in disbelief. An excuse!

"Y-yeah! Kabuto's right!" said Itachi, sweatdropping. The real reason he went to the site was so that he could figure out how to prepare Kisame's food of choice, sashimi.

outside 

"I've heard loads of weird excuses before but this is ridiculous." said Sasuke. "That one tops even Kakashi-sensei's weirdest excuse."

"Which was. . . .?" asked Kiba.

"That he had gotten up early for once only to bump into a horde of fangirls."

"Which you believed, I assume?" said Neji.

"Well, with my kind of lifestyle, not hard to believe." shrigged Sasuke. "Most are content with just stalking with me, though."

Naruto, recovering from the incident earlier, opened a bag of potato chips. . . . .

. . . . . which caught the attention of Akimichi Chouji, having left one of Konoha's more popular barbecue restaurants. It happened to be near Iruka's house.

"I smell potato chips." said Chouji simply, and he proceeded to investigate, only to find several of his pals in his sensei's garden.

"Chouji!" said Naruto. "Your smelling can't be THAT good, otherwise you'd be an Inuzuka!"

Chouji began munching on the chips.

"There's a really good Korean barbecue restaurant nearby." said Choji between mouthfuls.

"That explains it." said Lee.

"Akimichi." said Gaara. "Did you know that Naruto and Sasuke were fu-"

"WE WERE NOT!" shouted the two shinobi.

Oto 

"Ooh, this is hilarious." said Sakon. "You paying attention, ni-san?"

"Yeah." replied Ukon.

"Who knew?" laughed Jirobu.

"How does Kabuto know so much anyway?" wondered Tayuya. "As far as I can tell, all he does is treat people and conduct research for Orochimaru-sama."

"Who knows what those do when they're all alone. . ." said Kidomaru with a smirk.

Everyone laughed, with the exception of Jirobu who said "Bleargh."

"Your jokes are getting better, Kidomaru-kun." smled Tayuya.

"Really?" said Kidomaru, with a big smile on his face. "So you'll go out with me?"

"No, no, and for the last time, no!" said Tayuya. "You're more annoying than greenie!"

"Who, Lee?" asked Kimimaro.

"Yeah, him! He looks better than you as well!" said Tayuya.

"Don't compare me with that fuzzy eyebrows shinobi!" said Kidomaru.

"She's right, he DOES look better than you." said Sakon.

"It's the self-confidence thing." said Ukon. "I read about it in one of Tayuya's magazines."

Everyone stared at Ukon.

"Ni-san, are you okay? Ever since the separated us two for medical treatment, you've been acting strangely. . ." said a worried Sakon.

"I'm fine, but all there is to read around here are Kabuto's medical journals, and he writes stuff like a doctor! I can't make out what he's written!"

"That gives you no reason to read Tayuya-chan's magazines!"

"Who gave you permission to call me Tayuya-chan!" screeched an annoyed Tayuya.

Kimimaro smiled at his friends as they argued. Nothing had changed.

He noticed the onscreen Deidara about to say something.

"Hey guys, stop arguing for a minute and come see this. . ."

And there ends this segment of ToD! I hope I got the Sound Five (or six, counting Ukon) personalities right! Hope you enjoyed it!


	6. Chapter 6

Sorry for the long delay! Been busy for the past few weeks. . .

Truth Or Dare II chapter 6

The viewers watched in suspense as Deidara opened his mouth. . .

"Now for another Uchiha Itachi secret! He's in love with-"

"OH NO YOU DON'T!" yelled Itachi, tackling Deidara, and covering his mouth.

"You're in love with who!" said Kurenai, who loved a good romance.

Asuma watched with great interest.

"Okay, Itachi! You may be an S-class criminal, but in this case I shall make an exception and help you! Who's the lucky girl?" said Asuma.

"YOSH! I, Maito Gai, shall assist with the educating of the youthful Uchiha Itachi in the field of romance!" said Gai, slapping Itachi on the back.

Itachi backed away from Gai slowly. "Don't touch me. . ."

Deidara managed to squirm out of Itachi's sleeper hold and squealed "He's in love with-"

"Will you just shut up already?" said Itachi, threatening to slit Deidara's throat.

"Ehehehehe. . ." said Deidara, sweatdropping. "Okay, okay, I'll say something different. . ."

"Good." said the enraged Uchiha, letting go of Deidara.

"Okay!' smiled Deidara, taking out a little notepad. "Which one should I say?"

"You wrote them all down!" said Itachi, horrified.

"How come you know so much, Deidara?" asked Kisame.

"Blackmail." he grinned. "Itachi's very ticklish! Let's see here…"

Deidara produced a feather out of nowhere and tickled Itachi's ear.

"GAK! No! Stop-hahaha! Hee hee! STOP IT hahaha" laughed Itachi. (Cue fangirl scream!)

outside….

"Aha! More blackmail material!" smiled Sasuke, with an evil look in his eyes.

"Uchiha seems to be enjoying himself." noted Gaara. "I wonder what he and Naruto did to each other a while ago."

"WE DID NOTHING!" screamed the two genin.

"Saaasuke-kuun!" said Sakura, jumping over Iruka's fence. "Found you!"

"No fair, Sakura! Sasuke's MINE!" said Ino, following Sakura. She grabbed Sasuke's arm.

"How many times have I told you HE IS MINE!" said Sakura, grabbing the other arm.

"He belongs to neither of you." smirked Neji.

"Huh?" said both.

"NO!" screamed Sasuke and Naruto. If Ino got word if this, they'd be dead.

"He belongs to Naruto." said Gaara, smirking as well.

"I don't get it." said Ino.

"Sasuke. . . . Naruto. . . . ." said Sakura, a vein throbbing in her forehead.

"SasuNaru!" said Lee happily. "So youthful!"

"Say that again to my face!" said Ino, grabbing Lee by the collar. She glared.

"Ne, Sasuke-kun, what's the laptop for-EEEEE! Kakashi-sensei's mask is off!" screamed Sakura.

"WHAT!" said Ino, dropping Lee ("Ouch!"). She ran to the laptop and stared. "Sasuke-kun, what's your brother doing there?"

"Laughing his head off." answered Chouji.

While the genin were busy explaining the events to the two kunoichi, Deidara revealed the third Itachi secret.

"Itachi sleeps in purple pyjamas with puppies on them!" he said, like a little kid eating ice cream happily.

"Of all the things, he had to say THAT. . . ." said Itachi, sweatdropping heavily.

"That's not all! Sasori-kun sleeps with a teddy bear-"

"A little bit TOO much information there, Deidara!" said Sasori, sweatdropping himself.

Oto…

"Teddy bear? Aww, that's sweet. . ." said Tayuya, smiling.

"I sleep with a spider plushie!" said Kidoumaru, desperate to get Tayuya to go out with him.

"Okay now THAT is gross." replied Tayuya, inching away from Kidoumaru. "I'd rather marry Kimimaro than go out with you!"

"Huh?" said Kimimaro, now confused. "How'd I get into the argument?"

"I can see why!" snickered Ukon. "Kimimaro looks kinda cute confused."

"Gasp! Ni-san! You're GAY!" screamed Sakon.

"Come on, look at him!" insisted Ukon.

"Hey, he IS cute. . ."

"Oh no. . ." said Kimimaro. He hid under the blanket. "Why me!"

Back in Konoha, Deidara had spun the bottle, which landed on Tsunade.

"Dare!" said the now, very drunk Hokage.

Deidara read the paper.

"Spin the bottle, Hokage."

The bottle landed on Sasori.

"You have to kiss him."

"WHAT!" said Sasori. "Dara!"

"Gomene, Sasori-kun. . ."

"Get over here, you!" said Tsunade, upturning the coffee table. She was so drunk, she mistook the dare for a battle challenge.

"Gah! Get away from me!"

"Ack, my house!" said Iruka.

"Tsunade, calm down!" said Jiraiya, making sure she didn't beat Sasori up or something. . .

. . .but instead, ended up being thrown out of the roof.

"What the heck!" said a shocked Naruto.

"We've been discovered!" said Kiba, as Neji hastily sent a message to Tayuya saying that he'd send the rest another time. Lee and Gaara ran to get the cameras, as the Kikaichu bugs quickly flew for their lives. The rest of the genin ran for cover.

The Akatsuki members all grabbed Sasori and ran out of the house as soon as they felt the roof collapse.

"Aagh!" cried Iruka, who was about to be squashed by a wooden beam.

A white-haired jounin picked up the startled chuunin bridal style and jumped out of harm's way.

"You okay, Iruka?"

Iruka blushed, and nodded. Kakashi smiled.

"Let's go to my house, shall we?" said the jounin, as Iruka hugged him.

"Now THAT was a party!" said Orochimaru. "Shall we go home then, Kabuto?"

"Yes, Orochimaru-sama. Let's keep today's events between the two of us. I'll make sure that the Sound Five (or six) know nothing about today." replied Kabuto, blissfully unaware that the Sound nin in question were laughing like maniacs after seeing the last video feed that Neji had managed to send, which was Iruka's house collapsing while ninja jumped out of various places (like the big hole Jiraiya had made).

Shikamaru, who had wisely watched the proceedings from two houses away, laughed.

"I knew lending them that laptop wasn't too troublesome. . . Better go home to tell Tayuya."

The Truth or Dare orb lay hidden in the debris of Iruka's house for quite some time, until Konohamaru and his two pals Udon and Moegi arrived to deliver their school project to their sensei.

"Iruka-sensei? Huh? What happened here?" said a confused Udon.

"Hey lookie! It's a toy!" said Moegi, picking up the orb.

"That's no toy, that's a Truth or Dare orb!" said Konohamaru excitedly. "I read on the internet that those things are cursed! They bring misfortune to whoever uses them!"

The three gulped, looked at each other, and said. . .

"COOL!"

_Owari_

I'm writing an epilogue after this so don't forget to check for it! Thanks for reading this far! Short, I know, but I was running out of plot ammunition. . . Haha!


	7. Epilogue

This is the epilogue of **BOTH** ToD stories, 1 and 2. To everyone wondering why the ToD orb behaves like the Ring in Lord of the Rings, I did it on purpose. Last, but not least, thanks to everyone who made it this far for (1) reading, (2) reviewing, if you did, and (3) hopefully, laughing.

**The Epilogue**

_Part One. Akatsuki H.Q._

The Akatsuki was in quite a state.

Itachi had resumed his daily activities. . . Or so he thought. Ditching the purple pyjyamas, he began losing sleep, wondering if Deidara was in his room, watching his every move. Thankfully, the despicable bomber hadn't revealed his persistent infatuation to a certain pink-haired shinobi (Oops! I said it! Sorry Itachi!). . . . Or had he? Anyway, he began to pester- I mean, ask, the Akatsuki Leader if dango could be a daily addition to the menu.

"No." said the Leader simply. "And oh yeah, where are those pink ribbons in your hair?"

"Ribbons?"

"Yeah, there are pictures in Deidara's blog."

"DEIDARA!"

Itachi proceeded to investigate how much damage had been done that day by surfing the net. He made a mental note to himself to murder Deidara as soon as he saw that the blog had LOADS of pics. He smiled, however, when he saw a few of the sweet-looking Kisame and Anko pics. He HAD to wonder, though, how Deidara had a video of Orochimau's escapades and the extremely funny one of Kisame and the singing frogs.

Just as he'd logged into that fishing site, Kisame entered Itachi's room with some mission scrolls.

And lo and behold, the site featured Shark's Fin Soup.

Itachi nearly died that day, his Akatsuki robes ripped half to shreds by Samehada. he ran out of his room, shutting the door, and leaning on it.

"Deidara. . . . ." said Itachi, with a vengeance. "When I get my hands on you. . . . !"

His monologue was cut short by Kisame's sword piercing the door inches away from his face.

"We're not done yet! Trying to do me in, HUH!" he shouted, as Itachi made a mad dash for Zetsu's room. Zetsu was the only one Kisame feared besides the Leader, and there was a possibility that he (Zetsu) could talk things over with Kisame while Itachi went into hiding.

Deidara, sitting in a tree near the base's main building, proceeded to type into his internet journal.

"Dear blog, today was much more interesting than usual. Itachi nearly got murdered today by Kisame, and now that darling Uchiha's running for his life, poor thing. Sasori-kun's out on a mission and won't be back until tomorrow, and I miss him already. . ."

His typing was cut short by several loud explosions, and cries of "COME BACK HERE AND FIGHT YOU COWARD!", "ZETSU! HELP!", "IT'S DEIDARA'S FAULT!", "Don't mess up my room, I just had the carpet dry cleaned-Oh NOW you've done it, Kisame, you'll be paying for this!", and the occasional "DEIDARA! You'd better not show your face around here ever again!"

Deidara giggled. He loved chaos. Especially from fellow Akatsuki members.

_Part two. The Hidden Sound._

Jirobu was hanging around the courtyard (don't ask) when he heard voices.

". . . . Kabuto, I want to talk to you in private. Meet me in my quarters later." said the distinct voice of Orochimaru.

The rock-throwing nin turned a shade greener in disgust and alerted Tayuya.

"What? A day back and they're fooling around already?" she said, practicing her flute. "Pass the message to the others."

"I already know!" said Kidomaru, hanging from the ceiling Spider-man style. "My webs act as sound broadcasters too, you know!"

"Do you happen to have one in Orochimaru-sama's room?" asked Tayuya.

"Go out with me and I'll tell you." grinned Kidomaru.

Tayuya ignored the spider nin and conjured up a spirit that flew to Sakon and Ukon's room with the message.

Meanwhile. . .

"You still reading those, ni-san?" said Sakon, on the computer.

Ukon nodded. "Amazing. All those opinions girls write about guys are completely wrong, except for a few. But I've got to admit, Tayuya-chan doesn't use any techniques mentioned in the mags to reason with us. Wonder why. . ."

"Let's see, who did you say was right?"

"Somebody called 'Red Melody', I think."

Sakon leafed through a mag. "Red Melody? That's Tayuya all right. Here's an article she contributed. . ."

Ukon read the article, which was about boy's behaviors and what they meant.

"This one's really accuate!"

"Of course it is, she lives with US, doesn't she?" smiled Sakon.

A few minutes later, the brothers received Tayuya's message.

"WHAT!" they said simultaneously.

In Kimimaro's room. . .

"Sakon and Ukon again. I wonder what's going on. I hate being sick. . . ."

Tayuya entered the room.

"You'll be glad to know that Oro and Kabu have been having a very good relationship ever since yesterday." said the redhead.

She was followed shortly by Kabuto, who looked slightly sweaty.

"Okay Kimimaro, time for your checkup." said the grey-haired nin.

"Don't try anything funny now, Kabuto-san." said Kimimaro nervously.

"What do you mean?" asked Kabuto.

"It's nothing!" said Tayuya, sweatdropping. Suddenly, her mobile phone rang.

Tayuya's ring tone happened to be the Macarena. . . . Sung by Gai-sensei and the two frogs.

Kabuto turned around ominously.

"Tayuya. . . . Where did you get that?" he said, with a murderous look.

"Ehehehe. . . A friend sent it to me!" said Tayuya.

Quite coincidentally, Kimimaro's phone rang the text message alert, which was. . .

". . ._ pink._" said the recorded voice of Orochimaru.

Tayuya burst out laughing. "Yours is worse than mine!"

Kimimaro laughed hard. "Yours is just as bad, admit it!"

"You-you know?" said Kabuto. One nin could be taken care of. But two? Tayuya was hard enough to fight.

She nodded.

"Anyone else!"

"All of the Sound Five (or Six) know." said Kimimaro, smiling in pity. "I don't envy you, Kabuto, but everyone thinks you and Orochimaru are-"

". . . . oh no, I was afraid of this. . . ."

"Don't tell him!" said Tayuya, worrying for her comrades.

"It's not that!" said Kabuto, repacking his medical supplies.

"What is it then?" asked Kimimaro, now curious.

"If word gets out thenI'll never live it down!" said Kabuto frantically, running out of the room.

"Don't tell me. . . ." said Kimimaro, looking sick, but this had nothing to do with his illness.

"They really are. . ." said Tayuya, looking green as well. "Or maybe it's just Kabuto, but still. . ."

_Part Three. Konoha._

The day after both catastrophies.

Tenten was at her usual hangout, but something was different. Girls were all whispering around her.

Kiba approached her. "Hey, Tenten, what's up?"

Now, the girls looked at the two. They whispered more.

Tenten glared. "Do you realize that almost all of Konoha has seen pictures of us supposedly making out!"

"Um. . ." said Kiba. "Ah, look at the time! I'm late for training! Bye Tenten!"

"Look at them, they're so sweet together. . ." said one girl.

"Do you have a deathwish!" said Tenten angrily.

The girls looked at the kunoichi, scared out of their wits.

Before she could lay a hand on them, Neji and Lee came along, together.

"Good morning, Tenten! It's such a youthful day today! Don't you think?" said Lee.

"Why were you two together?" asked Tenten.

"Neji and I always meet up on the way for training!" smiled Lee. "He knows the quickest way to get here!"

"Now that I think about it, the two of you ALWAYS come together to training!" said Tenten. "Is there something going on? You guys can tell me, I won't tell anyone."

The two blushed slightly.

"Why there's nothing going on between Neji and I, Tenten! Just youthful rivalry, right, Neji?"

"Hmph." was Neji's reluctant reply.

"I DO recall not seeing both of you at your usual hangouts yesterday. . ." said Tenten, giving them a knowing smile. "Were you guys doing something?"

"As a matter of fact, we were!" said Lee.

"You WERE!" said Tenten. She hadn't expected THAT.

"Yeah. We were spying on the Godaime's party, which ended up with Iruka-sensei's house, you know. . ." said Neji. "None of the jounin know, so it'd be best if you didn't tell Gai-sensei." said Neji.

"Oh." said Tenten. "Anything interesting happen?"

"Kakashi-sensei took his mask off. Interesting enough?" smirked Neji.

"WHAT!"

"That's not all! We think Sasuke and Naruto-"

"Did it." said Neji.

"Did what?"

"It."

"What it?"

"You know, IT!"

Tenten's expression changed from confused to shocked.

"THAT it?"

"Yes, THAT it."

"Oh gosh, does Sakura know?"

"I told her! She didn't seem to understand!" said Lee.

"Ino knows as well, she's just in denial. Personally, I'm glad they're together, I'm tired of seeing a Sasuke fangirl every direction I look." said Neji, walking off to training. Suddenly, his phone rang.

Of course, it was Gai and the Macarena.

"Is-is that Gai-sensei!" said Tenten, trying to stop herself from laughing.

"Yes, it's him. We have a video, you won't believe it until you see it." said Neji, genuinely smiling and laughing as well. (Cue Neji fangirls!)

"It looks like I missed a lot!" said Tenten. Suddenly, a pink flyer hit her smack in the face.

"What's this. . . ?"

"Naruto's doing, I bet!" laughed Neji once more. It was a pic of Shino in the pink skirt. And beside it was a pic of the Kankurou-Shino moment.

Below it, was the caption: "See the unbelievable here, at www . dattebayo . com !"

"I'd better check that site later!" smiled Tenten.

Later. . . . .

"www. . . What was it? ah, dattebayo. . ." said Tenten to herself.

The webpage was full of scandalous info. Various links were: "Tenten and Kiba making out!" , "Orochimaru's fave color!" , "S-class info on the famous S-class criminal, Uchiha Itachi!" , "What Rock Lee looks like in his underwear!" (Tenten: "Yuck! Don't want to see THAT again!") "Iruka-sensei's guilty pleasures!" , "Shino in a miniskirt!" , "Sasunaru mania!" ("Now why on earth is that idiot embarrassing HIMSELF? Oh well, must be Temari.") , "Kakashi Unmasked! Total number of hits: (the number went up every few seconds)" , "What Gai-sensei sings in his spare time: Macarena frog medley, guest starring Hoshigaki Kisame!" , "Link to Dara's blog" ("Who's this? I'll ask Neji tomorrow.") and one in particular that caught Tenten's attention, "Anko and Kabuto making out in a closet!"

"Oh boy, looks like Konoha's never going to be the same ever again. . ." said Tenten, snickering to herself.

_Owari_

And that marks the official ending of this fic! Thank you for your time! And I hope you liked it!


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